'I refuse to let mum-in-law hold our baby after smoking - husband says I'm being OTT'
Copyright Source：
Yueke
Fri, Jun 28, 2024
PHOTO: Yueke
A new mum is fed up with her mother-in-law smoking around her baby, but she has been left in an awkward position after her husband says it "isn't a big deal".
It isn't always easy to bite our tongues when it comes to the actions and opinions of our in-laws. But one woman has drawn the line after confessing her mother-in-law keeps "ducking out for a fag" then instantly picking up her two-month-old grandchild.
The 39-year-old mum says she thinks her husband's mother should wash her hands, face, and change her top before holding her child. She even suggested putting a scarf over her hair to disguise the scent. The problem has annoyed the new mum so much that she has decided her mother-in-law cannot hold her grandchild after she has been smoking.
Taking to Netmums, the parent, who wishes to remain unnamed, said: "Am I being unreasonable to tell my mother-in-law she can't hold our baby after she's been smoking? She thinks it's fine to duck out for a fag then come straight in and pick up our two-month-old, without washing her hands or anything."
She added: "Personally, I think she should at least wash her hands and face and change her top. And maybe put a scarf over her hair?"
But the baby's dad thinks his wife is being "over the top" about his mum's smoking habits, though he agrees she should at least wash her hands post-smoke. The mum has been left confused about what to do. Speaking to Netmums, she said: "He also thinks it's not that big a deal, and won't say anything himself - says it's up to me if I want to say anything - grrr! Should I say something? Or tell him he needs to man up and talk to her?"
A number of people rushed to share their opinions and advice via the forum. One individual said: "It's not unreasonable to ask her to wait a while. Second-hand smoke is a thing even after finishing the cigarette and is not good for a young baby's lungs."
Another claimed: "The poisons in cigarette smoke will still be exhaled on a smoker's breath for two or more hours after they have finished their last cigarette. The toxins on the smoker's clothes will still be there until those clothes are washed, sometimes even after that.
"And everyone around the smoker will be affected by those toxins. Babies who grow up around smokers, even if they don't live with them, are more at risk of respiratory problems than children who are not regularly exposed to smoke. So, no, you're not being unreasonable."
Speaking about the dangers of smoking, the NHS said second-hand smoke is particularly harmful to children. A spokesperson stated: "People exposed to second-hand smoke face the same dangers as people who smoke themselves. They too inhale the same poisonous gases and thousands of toxic chemicals found in tobacco smoke.
"Their risk of developing smoking-related diseases will also increase. When you smoke, it's not just your health that's put at risk, but the health of anyone around you."
The NHS advises smoking outside. While this won't completely protect others, it will reduce the risk. It is also advised to clean and steam carpets regularly to reduce the toxic particles at home where smokers have been. "Do not leave cigarette butts or ashtrays in easy access of children, other people, or pets,"
It isn't always easy to bite our tongues when it comes to the actions and opinions of our in-laws. But one woman has drawn the line after confessing her mother-in-law keeps "ducking out for a fag" then instantly picking up her two-month-old grandchild.
The 39-year-old mum says she thinks her husband's mother should wash her hands, face, and change her top before holding her child. She even suggested putting a scarf over her hair to disguise the scent. The problem has annoyed the new mum so much that she has decided her mother-in-law cannot hold her grandchild after she has been smoking.
Taking to Netmums, the parent, who wishes to remain unnamed, said: "Am I being unreasonable to tell my mother-in-law she can't hold our baby after she's been smoking? She thinks it's fine to duck out for a fag then come straight in and pick up our two-month-old, without washing her hands or anything."
She added: "Personally, I think she should at least wash her hands and face and change her top. And maybe put a scarf over her hair?"
But the baby's dad thinks his wife is being "over the top" about his mum's smoking habits, though he agrees she should at least wash her hands post-smoke. The mum has been left confused about what to do. Speaking to Netmums, she said: "He also thinks it's not that big a deal, and won't say anything himself - says it's up to me if I want to say anything - grrr! Should I say something? Or tell him he needs to man up and talk to her?"
A number of people rushed to share their opinions and advice via the forum. One individual said: "It's not unreasonable to ask her to wait a while. Second-hand smoke is a thing even after finishing the cigarette and is not good for a young baby's lungs."
Another claimed: "The poisons in cigarette smoke will still be exhaled on a smoker's breath for two or more hours after they have finished their last cigarette. The toxins on the smoker's clothes will still be there until those clothes are washed, sometimes even after that.
"And everyone around the smoker will be affected by those toxins. Babies who grow up around smokers, even if they don't live with them, are more at risk of respiratory problems than children who are not regularly exposed to smoke. So, no, you're not being unreasonable."
Speaking about the dangers of smoking, the NHS said second-hand smoke is particularly harmful to children. A spokesperson stated: "People exposed to second-hand smoke face the same dangers as people who smoke themselves. They too inhale the same poisonous gases and thousands of toxic chemicals found in tobacco smoke.
"Their risk of developing smoking-related diseases will also increase. When you smoke, it's not just your health that's put at risk, but the health of anyone around you."
The NHS advises smoking outside. While this won't completely protect others, it will reduce the risk. It is also advised to clean and steam carpets regularly to reduce the toxic particles at home where smokers have been. "Do not leave cigarette butts or ashtrays in easy access of children, other people, or pets,"
This hearty meal is perfect for busy days.
Most of us don't want to spend more time than we have to in the kitchen, especially when we all lead busy lives that mean we have a hundred other things we'd rather be doing than making dinner. But thankfully, if you have a busy Saturday ahead of you, or you're looking to plan a tasty midweek meal for next week, Mary Berry has you covered with a quick and easy one-pot fricassee.
The former Great British Bake Off judge said she makes the tasty chicken stew as a "midweek supper," and it can be made up to one day in advance, meaning you could make it this weekend to kickstart your week. What's more, it only takes 20 minutes to prepare and can be slowly cooked in the oven.
Mary shared her recipe in her cookbook, and said: "We often have friends round for a midweek supper and this is a perfect dish to make ahead. We like chicken thighs, skinned but left on the bone for full flavour, but you could also use skinned chicken breasts."
Ingredients
You will also need a frying pan with a lid or an ovenproof casserole dish to prepare the dish.
Method
First, preheat the oven to 160C, or gas mark 3. Then, start by cutting the onions into wedges, slicing the fennel bulbs into thick slices, and chopping the tarragon. Set all this to one side and add oil to your pan and heat it until hot, before seasoning your chicken with salt and pepper and searing it quickly in the pan.
Remove the chicken from the pan and set it to one side. Add the onions and fennel to the pan and cook for roughly five minutes, stirring occasionally so the vegetables cook evenly. Pour in the sherry and let it boil on a high heat until the liquid has reduced by half, then pour in the chicken stock and return the chicken to the pan.
Bring the mixture to a boil, cover the pan with a lid, and then transfer it to the oven. Cook the mixture for 45 minutes, or until the chicken is cooked and tender. If you're using chicken breasts instead, it'll only take around 30 minutes. Two minutes before the mixture comes out of the oven, add the cornflour in a small bowl with a little cold water and stir until you have a smooth paste.
Transfer the pan with the stew mixture back onto the hob, then stir in the creme fraiche and then add the cornflour paste. Stir on a high heat until the sauce has thickened. Add in the tarragon, sugar, and lemon juice, then season once again to preference.
